Knowing Christ Intimately

Although it has been many years ago now since I first read the statement by the renowned Scottish pastor, Robert Murray M'Cheyne, I've never forgotten it. M'Cheyne was confiding in his friend Andrew Bonar. He whispered it with deep conviction, "Andrew, it seems I know Jesus Christ better than my closest kin." Imagine that, my friend! Can I say that? Can you say that?

Is it possible to work for Christ and His Church without getting to know Christ? Can we spend a lifetime engaged in good works and service in behalf of others without cultivating a personal, growing relationship with the Lord Jesus? Can we preach, evangelize, write, publish books, produce recordings, and fail to learn who the Master actually is?

Recently while meditating during my own time of private worship, I expressed to the Lord how dissatisfied I was with my devotional life. I was going through a "dry" time. The Word was not having the impact on me that I knew it should, and my prayers didn't seem to be rising any higher than the ceiling.

So on this one morning things came to a halt. I was tired of going through the motions. I simply, but honestly prayed (I am here paraphrasing), "Lord, this has to stop. What's going on? What is supposed to happen during this time I'm spending with You, anyway? It seems I'm making no progress."

Now, I wasn't looking for spiritual fireworks—that's not the point. There was something missing. What was it?

I continued, "Lord, what do You want to accomplish during this quiet time? What is this all about? Is it a matter of reading so many chapters in Your Word? Is it a matter of staying on my knees for a specific amount of time?" Of course, I knew it wasn't.

Since the day of my conversion to Christ, I have consistently and systematically met with the Lord in the early morning hours. But now, here I was, a seasoned pastor of some 34 years, a publisher of a Christian magazine, and a teacher of the New Testament, asking the Lord such questions.

And the Lord answered—He always answers honest prayers. And this is what the Lord Jesus said to me that morning: "You have forgotten that this time is to be used in getting to know Me. Spend this time with Me." That was all. But that was enough. I had my answer. I had forgotten. I needed a reminder. And I hope I'll never forget what I heard (re-heard?) that morning.

After all these years I'm still learning—and re-learning—, and it looks as if I'll never graduate. I should have known better. However, our Lord is gracious and full of mercy. He didn't scold; He didn't lecture me. He spoke as kindly and as tenderly as one might imagine.

So I'm passing this and the following, along to you. But I don't want you to think that I'm an "arriver." I'm not. I'm a "desirer," a learner, a disciple of the Lord Jesus, a faulty follower. The language of the apostle expresses the language of my spirit, "that I may know Him . . ."¹

How might we develop a growing intimacy with the Lord Jesus? How might we get to know Jesus better?

Intimacy Requires Privacy

Just as the most intimate moments between a husband and wife are spent in the privacy of a bedroom, so the devout follower of Jesus Christ cultivates an intimacy with his Lord and Savior in private.

Although corporate worship has its rightful and necessary place (family and church), every thirsty-hearted disciple of Jesus learns early on the importance of spending time alone with Him: time to listen to the Shepherd's voice, time to confess his personal failures, time to offer his love and worship, time to intercede for others, time to be refreshed by the Master's presence—time . . . alone . . . just you and Jesus . . . in private . . . unhurried.

How often has a wife been offended because a husband spends only enough time with her in private to receive quick, physical gratification? I wonder if in observing our private moments with the Lord, we are looking more often than not for a quick fix for our consciences than we are in cultivating a growing relationship with our Brother, Friend and Shepherd?

Just this week I was reading once again from David Brainerd's diary. One entry read: "I continued wrestling with God in prayer for my dear little flock here; and more especially for the Indians elsewhere; as well as for dear friends in one place and another; till it was bed time and I feared I should hinder the family, etc. But oh, with what reluctancy did I find myself obliged to consume time in sleep!"² Think of what Brainerd wrote: "But, oh, with what reluctancy did I find myself obliged to consume time in sleep."

This passionate missionary to the American Indians didn't write that so you and I could read it. His diary only came to public view after his death. There he was, recording his thoughts in private, expressing his reluctance to go to bed because of the personal conversation (intercession) he was having with his Lord. If this sounds extreme to our ears, it may say more about us than it does about David Brainerd.

Jesus spent extended periods of time alone with the Father: "One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God."³ Why did Jesus do this? Because He wanted to, He needed to, and he loved to. To Jesus, His relationship with the Father meant everything. As the Word and Son, from all eternity He had been in communion and fellowship with the Father. That never changed in coming to earth.

Jesus knew that if He was to minister in the power of the Spirit, if He was to touch the lives of needy people with eternity, if He was to make a lasting change in others—He Himself must stay close to the Father. Nothing must interfere! He saw to that. He must get alone—often. He must spend time with the Father.

Intimacy requires privacy.

Intimacy Creates Change

One cannot cultivate a lifetime of intimate encounters with the Lord Jesus and not be transformed by them. To know Jesus is to change. To increasingly know Jesus is to change. To intimately know Jesus is to change—to change who and what we are into who and what He causes us to be. Some call this process "spiritual formation; others call it "Christian perfection." Still others call it "growing in grace." I'll let the theologians quibble about the terminology. I prefer to call it "becoming more like Jesus."

I remain unconvinced that one, two—or three or four—spiritual encounters will produce in me or anyone else perfect Christlikeness. Yes, I believe in—and I believe God's Word teaches—a genuine, life-changing conversion to Christ. I believe in—and I believe God's Word teaches—a baptism with the Holy Spirit (not to be confused or made synonymous with speaking in tongues). But neither of these experiences will suddenly produce in me a total, perfect, complete change which requires no improvement. God offers to no one—in my understanding of the doctrine of sanctification—such an experience.

What God does say to us, for example, through the apostle Paul is, "we . . . are being changed into the same image."⁴ Note: "are being changed."

There is a wonderful change that comes to every repentant sinner, inwrought by the Holy Spirit, upon trusting in Christ as Lord and Savior. Paul said of the Thessalonian believers: "you turned to God from idols to serve a living and true God."⁵ In speaking of the future resurrection, he writes to the Corinthians, "we will all be changed—in a flash, in a twinkling of an eye."⁶

So for the true Christian: he has been changed and he will be changed. But in the meantime . . . he is being changed—changed more and more into the likeness of the Lord Jesus.

Are we becoming more like Jesus?—that's the question.

But we can't pursue this relationship with Jesus self-consciously. Spend time with God, seeking to do His will, and He will produce the results. Don't worry about whether your face glows or not—self-conscious holiness is no holiness at all.

Intimacy Produces Authenticity

One thing that surfaced time and again during Christ's ministry was how much he despised phoniness. There were always those hanging around Jesus who wanted the reputation of being "holier than thou." But their brand of holiness was ugly, tasteless, sick. The Pharisees were phonies. They projected an image of righteousness, but they had hearts filled with wickedness. May God forgive us for not being real!

One cannot develop an intimate relationship with the Lord Jesus and remain a phony. Jesus was authentic. He was authentically compassionate and caring, He was authentically kind and considerate, He was authentically righteous and joyful. He was authentic in what he taught, what He said, and how He lived. There was no disparity between his life and His lips, between his private moments and His public ministry.

What about you and me? Are we genuine? Are we for real?

Some years ago I had a couple who came to me for counsel. He pastored a church a few miles from where I was pastoring at the time. One of the first words out of the wife's mouth was, "Ralph, I can't stand how _______ (naming her husband) can act so hateful toward me five minutes before we leave for church, and then when we get to church he puts on the biggest smile and starts acting like a saint!" Well, to say the least, this pastor and husband was not living an authentic Christian life.

While no Christian will achieve perfect, Christlike consistency in this life, yet one cannot spend extended periods alone with the Lord Jesus and leave those sessions wearing a mask. There will be times when we'll leave those quiet moments needing to make adjustments in our relationships, confessing to another our failure to speak or to act in a Christlike way. Or there may be some activity we've engaged in that the Lord has spoken to us about that needs pruning. We can't leave the holy place and walk out the same. We can't hear the voice of our Shepherd and then leave, pretending we never heard. That makes for phoniness. Jesus wants us to be real, and we can only be real with others as we become real with Him—during those times we spend alone—together.

Intimacy Generates Knowledge

The essential motive for the disciple wanting to spend time with His Lord is to gain a better understanding of God and His ways. I need to know God. I want to know God. By spending time alone with the Lord Jesus I becoming better acquainted with His Father and my Father. "Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father."⁷ Christ's mission on earth was to introduce us to His Father, to bring us to the Father, to reveal to us the Father.

As His disciples developed a growing friendship with Jesus, they were better able to understand His relationship with the Father: how much He worshiped and loved the Father, how His will was perfectly one with the Father's, how He never acted on His own initiative but always according to His Father's will. They saw that Jesus was always in constant communion with the Father. Jesus magnified His Father.

As we get to know Christ intimately, we too will grow in our understanding of the Father, learning the true heart of God as it is revealed in Jesus. And we will learn that we can only become closely connected to Jesus and learn of the Father and His ways as we continually receive and are open to the Holy Spirit. For it is the Holy Spirit who introduces me to Jesus, and Jesus who introduces me to the Father. And it is by this same Spirit that the Father and Son come to make my heart their home: "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him."⁸

My desire is to know God, to get better acquainted with God. I do this by becoming intimately acquainted with His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. And as I get to know Christ better, I learn to know myself better—my weakness and His strength, my limitations and His possibilities, my sin and His holiness, my humanness and His power. And with this knowledge, I seek to worship Him and wish to spend my life serving others in His name to His glory.

Is it not true, dear reader, if we knew Jesus better, we would be a better Christian? If we knew Jesus better, we would be a more grateful Christian. If we knew Jesus better, we would be more joyful Christians. If we knew Jesus better, we would be a victorious Christian. If we knew Jesus better, we would be a more compassionate Christian. If we knew Jesus better, we would be a more courageous Christian. If we knew Jesus better we would be a more merciful Christian. If we knew Jesus better, we would be a kin-der Christians. If we knew Jesus better we would hate sin more. If we knew Jesus better, we wouldn't make moral compromises. If we knew Jesus better, we would want others to know Him too.

Pray for me . . . that I will seek to know Jesus better—that I will know Christ intimately.●

All Scripture references are taken from the New International Version except as noted.

1. Philippians 3:10
2. David Brainerd; Diary p. 403
3. Luke 6:12, NIV
4. 2 Corinthians 3:18 (my translation)
5. I Thessalonians 1:9
6. 1 Corinthians 15:51-52
7. John 14:9
8. John 14:23