Bitter Christians

The spirit of bitterness is impartial; it can strike anywhere. It doesn't care whether you're a Baptist or a Wesleyan, a Methodist or a Presbyterian, a pastor or a layman, young or old, male or female. Where the "soil" conditions are just right . . . bitterness will surely invade the heart.

The Apostle Paul was addressing Christians when he wrote: "Get rid of all bitterness. . . . (Ephesians 4:31). Likewise, in the Book of Hebrews, the author warned Christians: "See to it . . . that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many" (12:15).

A bitter Christian never contains his bitterness--he spreads it.

A bitter Christian never contains his bitterness; he spreads it. The body of Christ eventually becomes infected, trouble ensues. Brothers and sisters in Christ are influenced, defiled. Interestingly enough, our English word "bitter" comes from an old root word which means to "bite." Bitterness is an offspring of the devil. A bitter person spews venom, which by its very nature is poisonous.

Years ago, for some reason, a customer became infuriated with his bank. He plotted a "stinking" scheme to vent his anger. One day he walked into the bank and rented a safety deposit box under an assumed name. He carefully filled the box with his "treasure."

In just a couple of days a rotten odor filled the area. The place wreaked with a foul smell. Everyone using the boxes complained, and of course the employees and management were frantic to find the cause. Eventually the odor oozed out to envelop the entire bank. Everyone went around holding his nose.

Finally, after eleven long days, the source of the odor was discovered. Inside the recently rented safety deposit box were the remains of three large fish!

That demonstrates the power of bitterness. It has a way of seeping out and contaminating the atmosphere: the marriage, the home, the church.

What causes some Christians to become bitter?

We become bitter whenever we fail to deal with our hurts forthrightly with forgiveness. Any of us, regardless of how spiritually mature we may be, are capable of being hurt by an unkind remark, an unthoughtful action, or an unjust deed. Godliness doesn't dehumanize us. While Christians should not be "touchy," they should be aware of another's attitudes and feelings. After all, Christians aren't—or, shouldn't be—impersonal, desensitized mummies!

We can't live in community without occasionally being wounded by those we love. That's life—home life as well as church life. Christians are not always kind and considerate, thoughtful and sensitive. And that's why the people we care for the most are capable of hurting us the most deeply. If we didn't love them or have a significant relationship with them, we couldn't be hurt by them.

We become bitter whenever we fail to deal with our hurts forthrightly with forgiveness.

But how should we handle our hurts? In the words of the famed Barney Fife: "Nip it in the bud!" Whenever you have been the object of a careless remark, an unthoughtful action, an unjust deed—take it to the cross . . . immediately. Forgive that offending person in your heart, right on the spot. Don't carry it out of the room. Don't take it home with you. Be done with it. Don't give it a chance to fester.

I can remember as if it were just yesterday—though it has been thirty-one years since my father died. Some time following the funeral I walked out to the garage where dad had kept quite an assortment of tools. I knew he would have wanted my brother and me to have them. But I was shocked, to put it mildly, when I discovered the tools were gone. My stepmother, I learned later, had given them to her son. I was disappointed and angry. She had no right to give my father's tools to her son. But I was soon to be taught one of my first lessons in how God wants a Christian to handle his hurts.

As soon as I became angry the Holy Spirit brought to mind a Scripture I had memorized just a short time prior to this incident: "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you" (Ephesians 4:32, KJV).

That settled it. I said, "Thank you, Lord for forgiving me of all of my sins. I forgive _________ for what she did with Dad's tools." And it's been settled for all these years.

How does God want His people to react to their hurts? With expeditious forgiveness. Forgiveness. We will never have to fight bitterness as a flower if we learn to nip our hurts in the bud—by forgiving.

How many marriages could have been saved if the parties had handled their hurts with Christian love? How many strained relationships could have been healed if the aggrieved persons had only practiced forgiveness? How many damaged emotions could have been spared if that wounded believer had only taken his hurt to Calvary?

We have a daily choice: We can choose to grow in love, or we can choose to grow in bitterness. By the grace of God, I've made my choice—today I choose to forgive and grow in Christ's love. How about you? Remember this: We are never more Christlike than the moment we forgive.

If I say, 'Yes, I forgive, but I cannot forget,’ as though the God, who twice a day washes all the sands on all the shores of the world ,could not wash such memories from my mind, then I know nothing of Calvary love. --Amy Carmichael